The Brave New World of Fat4

Malaysia - World’s Number One Underground Economy

Every country has an underground economy. It is a matter of how big it is. It is interesting to see Malaysia’s GDP or GNP or whatever economic measuring tools you use is only 10% of its neighbour Singapore but yet the people living in Malaysia can be seen driving nice big cars, live in big houses and fly around the region. Unbelievable? No wonder even newspapers around Malaysia recently claimed how Hillary Clinton has said that US are willing to learn from Malaysia and another proudly claimed that Obama salutes our PM. Come to think of it, besides being near to his childhood home of Indonesia, I doubt he will remember anything about Malaysia.

Now, what brought upon the above discussion? While I was downing my favourite wan tan mee at a local shop this afternoon, where tables were placed very near one another, I swore that I was part of the conversation that took place on the table beside me. I almost wanted to butt in every now and then in amazement at one of the fellow sitting on that table. This fellow can be seen as your typical “Ah Beng” or small time gangster. And beside him were two smartly dressed office workers in their ties (even though it is hot and humid in tropical Malaysia).

The topic of purchasing auctioning properties were at the table. Rather than the office workers advising the Ah Beng on proper procedures, it was the other way round. Terms like LACA and NCL cases were thrown about readily. Payments must be made in 90 days or 120 days depending on whether it is the former or the latter. Things like how you should send in your application to the bank with strong credential so that the bank will lend you money for the balance of payment. I thought the Ah Beng must be working for someone like Lehman Brothers or AIG.

I wasn’t too far from the mark when he suddenly remarked to his two buddies (from my deductions, they must be childhood schoolmates) that they shouldn’t come to him for financial help. He had seen far too many people getting the shorter end of the sticks when they borrow from his “organisation”. He advised them to look for proper banks to see if their earnings are enough to meet the criteria of the banks. He even asked if they had been late on credit card bills and other borrowings as they would evidentally show on CCRIS. Apparently their organisation also vet people via another system called Sek See (in cantonese means eat shit).

I was taken aback when the Ah Beng further explains how subprime happened and that we have been tricked by westerners regarding this matter. His best quote was our 97 financial crisis did not even shake the west but yet the west not only shake ours but raped our butts and left us high and dry.

Ah Beng wasted no time in explaining short sellings and how he made a bit recently especially with the volatile share prices. Apparently their organisation knows how to syndicate certain counters. Oh yes, those counters you see going up in a short period of time and then falters like nobody business. Yeah, apparently they have a hand in it. Perhaps he is boasting or he may not as he correctly pointed out a few counters which could easily suggest manipulation of share counters in other countries.

All these lead us to other crucial points. Malaysia has always been in the limelight for the wrong reasons. We were one of the most lucrative pirated software and movies heaven for a while until China took over. We are still one of the transit points for human trafficking. We still trade in exotic animals whether for exhibition or for consumption purposes. Though muslim country, we thrive in the adults entertainment industry, no doubt that even one of our ex-minister supports the industry by watching them.

Malaysia has always been a creative country. If only we are a little bit more open and legalise all these illegal activities, perhaps we could easily match some of the world’s leading economy. Though some would argue it would be morally wrong to do so.

I swore I remembered reading a book when I was a much younger ciku and the title of Top 50 Criminals of the world, there were a couple of Malaysians.

Even recently, we were almost blacklisted as a tax heaven for some and that we are protecting the wrong people. Though I believe that these countries were doing it all the while just that it is possible for some countries to do it, they rather ban the whole industry.